Paying a Price

 I was sitting there at the corner of my bed, with Khawlah intrigued with her plays, I spaced out for a couple mins to the reflection of my life -up until now. I ponder how my life appears to the eyes of others; either sad or happy, either inspirational or manipulative; scented roses or scraps? It doesn’t matter much to be honest, just a matter of check and balance between posted & reality. 

But to many, of groups I had spoken with, some had thought that I’m one of God’s favourites. I wouldn’t blame them, I had almost believed I am too. Allah has blessed me with so many things beyond my prayers, better and even gets better each time. Alhamdulillah all praise to Him.

While all His Blessings are undoubtedly due to His Merciful & Especially Merciful; I came to realisation it is not because He favours me. Instead, it is because I favour Him the most & utmost. 

And when my favouritism priority fell apart these days,I had His Blessings broken piece by piece. 

I thought it’s God’s way of punishing my negligence, but literally it is His way of bringing me back to the right path; which at the end a worthy “punishment” (price to pay) for the happy ending at the end (jannah). 

A thing to always keep in my mind is that, the entrance fee to paradise is costly; it costs more than whatever I had in this dunya; and never to compare with. But that price is affordable to many; it is only a matter of who truly cares to prioritise paying its price instead of any other fancy things in this dunya.